Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the president of Iran, is a Jew

Oy! You spend your whole life trying to distance yourself from the Jewish faith. You give speech after speech calling for the abolition of that cursed Zionist state. You truly aspire to be the best anti-Semite you can be.

And then what? Some putz – some schmuck journalist with a long-lens camera – reveals to the whole world your shameful Jewish past. Oy gavalt! Oy vez mear! What shanda befalls your name, Mahmoud, you shlimazel?

A dramatisation, perhaps. But rest assured that sentiments not entirely dissimilar to those will be frantically running through the Iranian president's mind today, as he wakes up to media reports that he, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the notorious Jew-hater, the guy who called for Israel to be wiped of the map – wait for it, you ready? – yes, he is a bona fide Jew.

The astonishing revelation has been unearthed by hacks from The Telegraph, who after analysing a close-up of the Iranian president's identity card learnt that his former surname was Sabourjian – a name recognised by the Ministry of the Interior as exclusively used by Iranian Jews.

Mr Ahmadinejad has never made a secret of the fact that he changed his surname when he moved to Tehran in the 1950s.

No justification for the switch was made public, however, nor has he ever revealed the name he formerly held. But with the cat now well and truly out of the bag, analysts are suggesting his constant anti-Semitic outbursts could be a form of overcompensation for this secret ancestry.

"This aspect of Mr Ahmadinejad's background explains a lot about him," began Ali Nourizadeh, of the Centre for Arab and Iranian Studies.

"Every family that converts into a different religion takes a new identity by condemning their old faith," Mr Nourizadeh told The Telegraph. "By making anti-Israeli statements he is trying to shed any suspicions about his Jewish connections. He feels vulnerable in a radical Shia society."

The paper also quoted an expert on Iranian Jewry as saying that the '-jian' suffix is specifically reserved for practicing Jews. Literally translated, Sabourjian means "cloth weaver," and it appears on a list of names compiled by Iran's Ministry of the Interior to denote citizens of Jewish descent.

A little-known fact about Iranian society is that - despite Mr Ahmadinejad's vitriolic asseverations suggesting otherwise - the country is home to the largest number of Jews anywhere in the Middle East outside Israel.

About 25,000 people in the Islamic Republic openly profess their Jewish heritage and faith, and synagogues are dotted throughout major cities such as Tehran. With Persian connections stretching back 3,000 years, the Jewish subset even enjoys representation in the Iranian parliament.

One of the country's most prominent Jewish leaders, Unees Hammami, recently told the BBC: "Imam Khomeini [the founder of the Islamic Republic] made a distinction between Jews and Zionists – and he supported us."

Unfortunately, the same can hardly be said for Mr Ahmadinejad. The outspoken leader's rantings and ravings on Israel are now so comprehensive that they have a sizable page on Wikipedia dedicated to them. Many of the most vitriolic remarks are from his notorious 'World without Zionism' speech, given in 2005, in which he called for Israel to be "wiped off the map".

Later that year, he aroused the disgust of historians, politicians and all sound-minded individuals by saying Jews should stop making an "awful fuss about that Holocaust". He suggested that many people made a "myth" of the event, before hosting his very own Holocaust Denial conference in 2006.

During this year's presidential debate, the Iranian leader shrugged off repeated questions probing the reason for his name-change. One blogger who suggested he might have Jewish roots was promptly arrested.

Mr Ahmadinejad has yet to respond publicly to the report.

 

Comments

[Altair]

Condemning Israel does not equal condemning Judaism.

[Constant Gina]

I'm torn. On one hand, I want to adhere to principle, take the high road, and say that the fact that Immadinnerjacket was once Jewish is of no political consequence. It's something for the psychologists to mull over, but otherwise a footnote in the life of this mad man. On the other hand, I'm tempted to play into the idea of a mass Jewish conspiracy and try to convince the Iranian hardliners that he's actually a Jewish sleeper agent, and should be dealt with post haste.

[Doodie]

A-Jad is always good for a laugh. But unfortunately now he’ll be forced to exterminate himself.

http://doodiepants.com/2009/10/04/mahmoud-ahmadinejad-forced-to-exterminate-himself-jewish/

[cd]

If true, does this make Ahmadinejad the ultimate self-hating jew?

[Martin (riverScrap)]

Regrettably, following a separate investigation by The Guardian, it now appears that Mr Ahmadinejad may not actually be a Jew:

http://www.examiner.com/x-4814-LA-Middle-Eastern-Policy-Examiner~y2009m10d5-Ahmadinejad-is-Jewish-accusation-may-be-political-tactic-by-opposition

It would seem that this report was yet another example of The Telegraph picking a version of the truth it wants to run with, and then drafting in an "expert" to prop up its otherwise tenuous view. And of course it's another example of riverScrap.com jumping along for the ride.

[weirdvis]

If this is true it couldn't happen to a nicer man...

:D